This last week I went back up to Kalasin (my greenie area) for a few days. It was great to see all the members there and see so many people that I taught that are still strong in the Church and even contributing to the continued growth of that small branch through their callings and personal missionary efforts. There are a couple guys (Bank and Bon) that should be putting their mission papers in sometime soon. It was great to hang out with Suwit and catch up with him. We were pretty tight there back in my greenie days and he even moved down to the Pakkret branch for a while for work while I was serving there.
To tell the truth, though, besides seeing all the members up there, I couldn't stand being in Kalasin. I forgot how completely boring it is. There is literally nothing going on. I think that's why President sends a lot of greenies there. They don't know any better yet so everything is interesting up there ... but it's not exactly a place where you'd wanna take an extended vacation. I was glad to be up there that week though because I got to celebrate Loy Krathong with the members. If I'd been down in Bangkok I might not have been able too because this year it coincided with the King's older sister's funeral so they didn't really have any big Loy Krathong celebrations.
The same day I got back from Kalasin I had to go up to an English camp in Chainat. I took a bus to meet up with the staff that were gonna be driving up. The money collector lady on the bus would not speak Thai to me. I'd ask her a question and she'd just make a face or something like that was the only way she would answer me. Like she would just point with her eyes. And for some reason that ticked me off ... something so little and stupid like that. I eventually got off the bus farther away from where I needed to be because she wouldn't tell me what stop I needed to get off on so that just put me in an even worse mood. I refused to pay more money for a taxi or motorcycle to take me there so I started walking.
There was this drugged out kid on the sidewalk so I walked into the park and must have walked half a mile in the direction I needed to be going only to find out that the only exit out of the park was the one I'd walked through in the first place. Of course I got even more ticked off. And the whole time in my mind I'm telling myself, "I have no reason to make such a big deal out of this. I'm here walking through this beautiful park and life is pretty great. Just try to enjoy the now." So I guess it's good that at least I can recognize when I'm being irrational and I'm trying to deal with it. Eventually I hopped the fence (pain in the butt) because I refused to walk all the way back to the entrance and I was carrying a couple heavy bags.
The English camp was fun. There were about 100 high school kids that we spent 2 days with doing activities and assignments and helping them apply their English language skills. I decided not to let the kids know I spoke Thai until the end of the camp, but that was a lot harder than I thought because when I hear Thai now or when someone speaks to me in Thai I don't translate it to English first or think of a response in English and translate it to Thai. For the most part I do my day-to-day thinking in English, but when it comes to speaking Thai my brain just switches to Thai mode.
Getting back from the English camp was a hassle. I rode with the staff from Chainat to Suphanburi. Then took a bus from there to Mochit in Bangkok. Then hopped on another bus to go pick up my motorcycle at Big C near Central World. Then I got some gas and started driving home. After hours of traveling I was almost home ... when I got hit by a truck. I've never been in an accident before so this was my first.
I was just driving along and at a safe speed too cause it had been raining and the roads were kind of slick. There was a truck parked (not moving) on the left side of the road (we drive on the left here) with its blinker on. Of course I saw him, but I had the right of way so I kept driving straight ahead in my lane (the farthest left of the two left lanes). And just as I was about to pass him he started to turn into the road. I turned/braked as much as I could on a slick road to avoid him and honked my horn and if he had stopped right then I probably could've have avoided him, but he just kept on turning and I slammed into the front right side of the truck.
Me and the motorcycle went down hard, fortunately not into oncoming traffic. With broken plastic and glass shattering around me. And it was right at that point that I lost control of my emotions and rage took over. As I write about it I feel shame for my inability to keep myself in check. Adrenaline was pumping through my veins and I got up out of the road and walked over to the truck and slammed both hands on the hood as hard as I could while yelling and swearing at the passengers through the windshield. Could I have hurt someone in the vehicle if they had stepped out of the cab right then? I don't know, but that uncontrollable rage only lasted for about 10 seconds before it dissipated.
I realized cars in the other lanes were honking at me to get my motorcycle out of the road so they could continue on their way home. They see accidents all the time. And I was obviously not badly injured as I was up on two feet. So I pulled my motorcycle out of the road into a side street and the truck drove over too. He called his insurance and we waited. The passengers were a couple guys and a couple girls in their late-20's. They checked to see if I was okay and honestly I did feel okay, but that was just the adrenaline. Eventually my hip started killing like it'd been overextended or something. It's still pretty sore today and so are the muscles in my left leg, left arm, and neck. Otherwise, no major injuries.
The guy (driver) admitted he was wrong, but then started arguing with me about how I had no place to slam his hood like that ... it had left handprints in his hood that he'd have to get pounded out. At first, I got defensive. How could anyone be expected to be accountable for their actions after getting into a car accident? Eventually, though, I realized that even if I felt like the person who had slammed his hood was not me (because I wasn't in control), I still had to take responsibility for it. It reminds me of the guy in Colorado who pulled over cause he'd had too much to drink. Then another drunk driver slammed into the back of his car and it killed the first driver's two kids. So he got out and walked over to the driver of the other car and beat him to death. Now he's in jail. And even though it feels like I can sympathize with him, I don't wanna be resigned to the thought that under circumstances I can't be in control of my own emotions. I know I can be. And especially when it comes to anger ... I have to keep it in check.
So eventually the insurance guy came and after an initial misunderstanding where it looked like the truck driver was trying to claim he wasn't at fault for the accident, the insurance rep agreed that his customer was at fault ... but that there was also the issue of the hood. That would have to be a completely separate case holding me responsible for the damage. In the end, the cost of repairs to the motorcycle would be a bit less than repairing the hood of his truck so they offered to let me just fix the motorcycle myself. The driver did, however, offer to take me around to get the parts for a cheaper price if I got quoted too high. He also told me that if I ended up going to get checked out by a doctor I could call him and he'd pay for the cost of the visit. I haven't gone to a doctor though. I'm just taking some Ibuprofen and trying to rest.
Honestly, the best way to describe how I feel is that "I got hit by a truck," but I'll be fine. And the motorycle didn't have any major damage so that's a good thing. The thing that has affected me more than the accident itself, though, was the realization that I have a long way to go in developing self-control over my emotions and appetites. If I hadn't slammed his hood, the insurance guy would've come and opened a case and would've paid for the repairs to my motorcycle and any hospital visits and that would be the end of it. But actions, no matter how little we may feel we are in control when making the choices that lead to those actions, have their consequences. And my consequences were that I had got hit by a truck and then still have to fork out the money to pay for the repairs myself.
I was supposed to have an audition for this Thai TV show called "Dan Daaraa" the next day, but I wasn't really feeling up to it so I called and moved it to the end of the week. I went down to the Immigration Office because my visa expired on that day and if I didn't renew it I'd get fined 500 baht/day. Fortunately, my friend's (Naam) little sister's (Tan) boyfriend's (Bio) father is like the head guy of Immigration in Thailand. I talked to Bio and he got me hooked up. They took good care of me and got me all the paperwork without having to wait in the obscenely long lines.
After signing everything, though, the lady helping me told me I just needed to pay the 2,000 baht visa renewal fee. I excused myself and got on the phone with Bio quick. I was under the impression that the "help" his dad could get me was that I could renew my visa for free. If it was just a matter of going down there and renewing it like everyone else I could've done that on my own. Eventually, he talked to his dad again and they got it renewed for me for free which was a major blessing for me. Money is tight, if you know what I mean ... like real tight. So this helped a ton. Now I can stay in Thailand for 30 more days and, lucky for me, my plane back to America leaves on the same day my visa expires.
I bought the first 4 seasons of The Office (TV series) for a good deal and I've been watching those a lot. I love that show. I'm getting real excited for Christmas. I'll be here for the stake Christmas activity and I'll get to perform a few numbers with another RM here named Devin Castleton. I'm gonna get together with him this week to practice and eat dinner with him and his wife. I'll get home just in time to celebrate a week of the Christmas season (better than Christmas Day itself) and spend time with my family. Hopefully there's snow. It's so hot here. I'm always sweating. Gotta shower twice a day.
I'm loving it here ... mostly. I honestly do get lonely sometimes, even with as many friends as I have here. The fact of the matter is, I can only handle seeing most of my friends (members, former investigators, etc.) occassionally, and there are only a select few that I would really like to spend most of my time with. But I don't think those select few believe me when I say that because they see that there are so many other people here that want a piece of my time. In the end though, I'm the one who gets to decide how I divide my time and who I spend it with.

